Gerko's Weblog

Wednesday, June 25, 2003

You may just not know it yourself, but on this day, Gerko turned 20 years old.

I was planning on writing some reflective stuff here, but ... well, guess that didn't work out.
Anyway, I'm 20 now, and I sometimes definatly feel old. 20. Geez. Scary stuff. Seriously, I mean it. I don't know. It's ... just whoa.

Twenty. 20. And I still feel like a kid sometimes. I yearn for those days every now and then.

So ... yeah. anyway. Time to move on from ... being a teenager, I guess.

You know what ? Until this day, my mom used to have 5 teenagers in the house. (at least when I was home.) Youngest sis turned 10 almost a year ago. (at the time of writing this, a little over a year ago, actually)

...

Anyway, my birthday wasn't too bad. Turned out nicer that I thought it would be. So I'm satisfied, I guess.

Oh, and mom still owes me a pair of pants.

Wednesday, June 18, 2003

[lots to tell, not nearly enough time or willingness to write. WHY NOT? .. Oh well. I'll be back. Also my apologies for those e-mails I haven't replied yet. I'll get around to 'em ! Really. ... ]

Sunday, June 15, 2003

I'm sorry. I don't know what's causing it, but I'm unable to write anything the last couple of days. Likewise, I've been unable to read anything lengthy on the computer, either. Just don't feel like I can keep my attention to anything when I'm behind the computer now.

Just not in the mood. 'course, today I had some excuses with even more people visiting and all, but still ...
... eh, I'll get my writing urge back. Surely, I will ... just ... not now.

So, yeah, I guess that's the end of my good mood streak. I'll get that back too, don't worry. Just ... fleh. Aside from not being able to feel comfortable behind the PC, I haven't been doing that bad, though. Well, aside from last wednesday, but more about that later. (I hope)

Saturday, June 14, 2003

I've been telling myself to start blogging again for a couple of days now.

Now I'm telling it myself again, but publicly this time.
Gerko, start blogging again, you do have stuff to write about.

Right, right. ... Tomorrow. ... uh, today, after sleep, that is. Hee.

Another reason for posting this is the return of Daily Dan !
He's Daily,
He's Dan,
He's Fat as Hell
And he looks like a Pig,
It's Daily Dan !
Go Dan the Cat ! woo !

Be sure to check that link every day, ya hear ? Doug should be updating that page for every new strip.

As for my reading habits... They've started slacking a bit. I'll get back to it, though ... more news after sleepy ...

Sunday, June 08, 2003

Got woken up by a ... thunder-storm of sorts. Shortly before 10 am the combination of thunder and heavy rain made me crawl out of my bed.

Now, I found this thunder to be quite peculiar. Yes, it was announced well in advance by the weathery people yesterday, but it being there isn't the strange thing.

What I found odd was the complete lack of storm. Lightning flashed every couple of seconds, and it never really did stop rumbling. But it was practically wind-still the entire time, the air sometimes coming to a complete halt, and never picking up over 'barely a light breeze'. Also, the sky. It wasn't a dark, omnious grey. Instead it was a very light shade of extremely dull gray. From horizon to horizon, it was one big, dull, light gray blanket. One one side it leaned to a very boring grey-blue, though. But you could only see the change by changing your view some 90 degrees instantly, as it was a very gradual shift.

Strange ?

Had that appointment in Middelburg last thursday. Some other branch of the whole "We, the goverment, are going to put you, Gerko, to work"-scheme. Got another appointment back there upcoming thursday ... and ... well, I don't know. The guy there practically said he could offer me a year-plan and a job, and I that I could probably start working early next month. I suppose that's good, even if it's probably some very low-level job. (Not that I was expecting anything else. Not from them, nor from anything I could find by myself.)

There's that nagging feeling though. Gerko is being taken care of once again. Again, I'm allowed to simply go along with the stream and remain passive. My problems become other people's problems and then cease to be a concern to me. It seems as if this has always been the case for me, and even now, or maybe even especially now it's the same thing all over again. So, sure, it may have left me hanging since late last year or so, but now that it really starts to matter, there's that safety net that's gently catching me in my descent. It's not that I really have this urge to get up and take care of everything myself. ... I just find it ... odd. As if the Universe agrees with my passive stance. I'm not sure if I like that.

After that appointment, I made my way to the library on foot, turned in Hitch Hiker's and replaced it with Thief of Time. For sake of my own sanity, I shall not describe the atrocious horrors I came to witness while checking out the dutch translated version of the fifth part of the "Transgalactic Handbook".

Later that evening, I sent out that e-mail to my High School english teacher. No reply as of yet, but I didn't expected one instantly anyway.

Wednesday Evening, June 4th

Wednesday Afternoon, June 4th

Wednesday Evening (later), June 4th

Thursday, June 05, 2003

Now, before I get around to typing over 3 other entries I wrote on my notepad yesterday, let me voice my discontent about the pile of clean-but-unfolded laundry on my bed.

*groan*

Tuesday, June 03, 2003

Finished The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy today. ... Since I have to go to Middelburg next thursday anyway, I suppose I'll go turn it in then. And get my hands on another book or something. Hrmmm ... according to their on-line catalogue, it doesn't seem like they have an english version of part 5 : Mostly Harmless ... They do have a ... *shudder* translated dutch version, though. So you'll understand my torn feeling regarding this. To read or not to read.

Anyway, suggestions are welcome. I paid €13 for that library card, and I'd better make use of it the rest of the year, or reading Hitch Hiker's is going be quite an expensive dealie. One friend suggested Thief of Time by Terry Pratchett .. hmmmm ...

Anyone else have suggestions ?
(Alique, shaddap !)

Monday, June 02, 2003

Alright. So, sleeping tonight actually wasn't that bad. Went smooth enough, I guess. Maarten (the housemate that let me in) had scrounged up some extra matrass somewhere I could sleep on, and with the current temperatures I didn't really need something to cover myself with. So I slept in a small hallway on a thing matrass, using two towels as an improvised pillow. Woke up 'round a quarter past nine, and my mom let herself in the house some 5 minutes later. (She rang the doorbells first, but something's awfully wrong with those, and no-one heard.) She gave me my keys and left shortly after. Not mad anymore or whatever. Heh. ... Thanks mom.

Driving lessons didn't go that smooth. Vehicle control is good enough, but my reactionary skills are still lacking. (Don't see things, or if I do see 'em, don't react to 'em properly, or at all. Crazy) ... Got another lesson tomorrow morning. Hope my head will be clearer then.

Had a dream tonight, which was quite ... 'possible' ... Dreamed that I woke up at 10:30, and somehow had slept through my mom dropping off my keys. ... I rushed downstairs to the front door, and found my keys there, on the floor, thrown in through the mailbox opening. I picked 'em up, hurried back upstairs to open my room, get my booklet and see what time I had my driving lesson at. (See, I had forgotten it, just thought that it was somewhere in the morning.), and hoping feverishly that I hadn't missed my appointment already. ... A wave of relief came over me as I saw that the appointment wasn't until 18:17 (what a peculiar time) and that I had pretty much all the time in the world left. Then a sense of futility spread, and I felt as if the entire night and having my mom drop off my keys had been for nothing. ... Shortly after that I woke up, and was quite relieved that I hadn't overslept anything. Heh.

How to get a girl

• Don't wear white socks

[1:04 am]
Well, would you look at that. Another handwritten entry, and what kind of reason could I have for that ? Quite easy, actually. I forgot my keys. Hee- I'm locked out of my room here in Vlissingen. Was locked out of the house, too, but one of my housemates who was just getting ready for bed was kind enough to open the door for me at about 11:30 or so.
Called home, and mom reluctantly offered to bring me my keys tonight, after letting me know she was quite upset about me forgetting them in the first place. But, I refused. I figure that if I am stupid enough to forget my keys I might as well live with the consequences. She's bringing 'em over tomorrow morning now. And that, only, becasue I need my booklet for my driving lessons tomorrom. (Which I, stupidly, left in my room. I usually take it home-home with me) Otherwise I would have come for 'em myself (with the train) tomorrow... euh-today.

So? What have I been up to in the past one-and-a-half hour, you ask ? I took a shower, shaved, got into my pyjamas. Then I went downstairs (Still the 2nd floor, only 'downstairs' in relation to the bathroom and my own room) to the kitchen-with-balcony, admired the smallish thunderstorm (Ah, that fresh smell//feeling of rain after a hot, humid day. Wonderful.) Then I got out my Stephen King bundle and read the remaining few pages of the last story in it. (It was about a pregnant woman on an island coping with "the end of the world", Night of the Living Dead-style. Zombies and all. It was a strange mixture of common, real, down-to-earth characters and the sci-fi horror of dead people coming back from the grave to eat you.) ... After that, I started on this blog entry, at the kitchen table.

One of my other housemates just talked to me for a bit. (Woke up for a bathroom break, I think, or maybe he was still up, not sure...) Asked me what I was doing and offered some help, or at least, the willingness to help, because there isn't really that much one can really do to help, I guess. Oh well, I guess I'd better go and try to get some sleep... Mom will be here in about eight hours, forty-five minutes, and I'd better be well-rested by then. (especially because I have driving lessons not long after that) Ah ! Another housemate just came home, too. Said hi, asked how the weekend has been and said goodnight. I don't think I told her I was locked out of my room. Heh.
Anyway, as said, I'd better got get some sleep. Goodnight !
[1:36 am]

P.S. I kinda like my handwriting in this piece. more-so for the first page than this second, but it's still not bad.